Life Advice
/Health
Man's Drug-Related Death Haunts Friend Who Found Him
DEAR ABBY: I met "Donny" 18 months ago. For a while, we were both happy. Then suddenly, every Friday, Donny would make some excuse, smoke a cigarette and go to the bar across the street. Afterward, he would show up here drunk, and we would argue. When Donny was sober, he was a great guy, but every weekend he disappeared. Although I tried every ...Read more
Loving Widow Ready To Move On From Her Loss
DEAR ABBY: I lost my husband two months ago after a long, debilitating illness. I loved him very much, and the loss was very difficult, although not unexpected.
After his funeral, an old friend called me offering condolences. He had lost his wife last year after a long illness, and he understood what I had been through. We both had lost spouses...Read more
Man's Job Change Opened A Disastrous Chapter For Family
DEAR ABBY: My husband, "Andy," and I have been together 25 years, married for 16. We have three kids ages 14, 11 and 9. Our marriage has always been a happy one. Andy began a government job five years ago, and after two years, he was traveling a lot.
Once he started traveling so often, I had a hard time adjusting to being everything for my kids...Read more
Middle-Age Son Refuses To Be Honest With Parents
DEAR ABBY: My son has trouble telling the truth. He was getting up late, dressing for work, leaving and coming back early. When my husband and I asked him about having a job, he said he had one. When we asked him to show us his paycheck, he fumbled around on his phone, then he confessed that he had no job. He said he has been at the library ...Read more
Elderly Mom's Change In Attitude Stumps Her Family
DEAR ABBY: My mom is in her early 80s. More and more often lately, she seems to be avoiding seeing me and my siblings. It wasn't always like this. She would let me, my husband and our kids stay with her when we visited. Even last year, when she fell and injured herself, she let me stay with her for a couple of days to help out.
My siblings have...Read more
Husband Insists Intimacy Should Occur On His Schedule
DEAR ABBY: I am frustrated with my husband. We have been together 18 years. When it gets close to my menstrual cycle, he gets into an angry panic for us to be intimate because he travels for work and is home only four nights a week. If we're not able to, he pouts, then becomes angry and distant, and peppers me for updates to determine how soon ...Read more
New Job Will Require A Healthy Dose Of People Skills
DEAR ABBY: I'm a man in my early 30s who has made a career switch. My new field requires me to be more social because I will be meeting with colleagues, some of them older than I am, and attending trade shows, meetings, and business and social networking outings. This was never part of my former job.
I'm somewhat shy, and I can be uneasy in ...Read more
Couple Offers To Watch Neighbors' Home Free Of Charge
DEAR ABBY: Our neighbors, "Wanda" and "Bob," have agreed to care for our house and cat when we vacation. We told them we'd like to pay them for their troubles, but Wanda says they want to do it for free. Bob just smiles.
Judging by her body language, Wanda seemed offended when I asked her how much she'd like to be paid. You see, I'm sure we can...Read more
Supportive Aims Shift To Intense Feelings Of Guilt
DEAR ABBY: I'm a member of Alcoholics Anonymous. A fellow AA member suffered critical injuries in a motorcycle accident recently and had been in the ICU for several weeks. I visited the hospital regularly, bringing cookies and offering support to his girlfriend, who is also in the program.
During my last visit, I unknowingly arrived at the ...Read more
Wife's Financial Planning Sparks Protest From Husband
DEAR ABBY: I've been married for 19 years to my second husband, "Jack." Our children are grown. When we met, I was a business owner, and he was retired. He has had numerous medical issues and procedures, and I have always insured him on my health plans and been his advocate. We have always had separate bank accounts and a household account we ...Read more
Man's Flirting With Others Finally Had A Consequence
DEAR ABBY: I have read letters in your column from women whose boyfriends or husbands flirt with other women in their presence complaining about feeling hurt and embarrassment. I was married for 25 years to a man who flirted with other women while we were dating and also after we were married. I told him many times that it hurt my feelings and ...Read more
Beloved Cousin Mired In A Miserable Rough Patch
DEAR ABBY: I love my cousin "Carly" like a sister. We come from a large family, and both of us are estranged from our mothers (who are sisters) as well as our siblings. We're OK with this because we have no room for toxic people in our lives.
Recently, Carly has fallen on hard times -- a bitter divorce and a failed business. She lost one son in...Read more
Man Repeatedly Harasses Walker With Rude Comments
DEAR ABBY: My husband and I walk around a local lake three times a week. We met another couple there who seemed pleasant until the husband tried to give me his doctor's name so I could "Get that 'thing' removed." ("That thing" being the beauty mark next to my smile.) I told him I wasn't interested.
The next time we met, he brought it up again. ...Read more
Boyfriend Has Personal Relationship With His Needy Boss
DEAR ABBY: I am a man whose long-distance boyfriend of one year has a married female best friend. (She's his boss.) She is also a tobacco-addicted narcissist who drinks a lot. They chat on the phone and text for hours every day because, as he puts it, "she can't be alone." I think she uses him to compensate for her insecurities. I also think she...Read more
Wedding Guest List Doesn't Include Late Grandfather's Widow
DEAR ABBY: My son and his fiancee are getting married in a few months. They are planning a small reception with only their closest friends and family. Unfortunately, this excludes my late father's second wife, "Bonnie," who has been in our lives for nearly 40 years. My son has no particular problem with Bonnie, but she has struggled with mental ...Read more
Bad Bed Makes Visiting Parents' Vacation Home Uncomfortable
DEAR ABBY: My father and stepmother have a vacation home in another state, and they invite us to visit every year. The problem is, the sofa bed in the guest room is so uncomfortable that it's impossible to sleep. However, they think that the bed is great because other guests have told them that. I find it hard to believe that the other guests ...Read more
Musical Friendship Has Fallen A Bit Out Of Tune
DEAR ABBY: I have a friend, "Chris," from our teenage days. We've been performing music together for decades. We live in different cities but get together every few years. Over the last 20 years, Chris has turned toward a fundamentalist viewpoint on religion. I found it too much to handle and have distanced myself.
Recently, Chris contacted me ...Read more
Couple's Sex Life Has Changed After Medical Procedure
DEAR ABBY: My wife is the love of my life. She is, and always has been, my dream girl. We used to have sex three or four times a week, but since her hysterectomy, she no longer desires sex. She's OK with scheduling sex on a certain date, but most of the time she doesn't follow through because she doesn't think about it, and I feel unwanted and ...Read more
Parents Punish Teen Because Of Her Sexual Orientation
DEAR ABBY: I am freshman in high school, and I live with my stepmother and father. They are great parents to me and my little brother but very homophobic. I love going to church with them, but I have a partner of the same gender. My parents recently found out and have decided as punishment to isolate me from everyone, including putting me in ...Read more
Roommate's Spending Habits Make It Hard To Move Out
DEAR ABBY: Nine months ago, my friend "Anne" moved in with me after losing her home following her boyfriend's death. Since then, she's had trouble finding employment, but when she does work, she spends money on stuff she really doesn't need. She's always talking about how she hates to be a burden on me and will move out ASAP. Then she buys ...Read more